Brace Yourselves
by Ratchet Maverick
Summary: <html><head></head>Do you know what's worse than facing the end of the world? Facing the end of the world with braces. Before I die, I am determined to get my braces off and if I get the girl along the way, who am I to complain?</html>
1. Chapter 1

If you knew the world was going to end, how would you spend your final days? Would you spend it with your loved ones? Wallow in self pity? Steal a packet of Dots and experience anarchy in all its glory? For me the answer was simple and it was none of the above.

You see, some may say that I have it all; the looks, popularity and the love of a supporting family, but for all that I am, I still have my flaws. I may be beautiful, hair a halo of pure gold and eyes so blue that the sky looks on with envy, but in my own perspective that is not what sticks out most. No, instead it is the monstrosity I bear on her face, seeking out attention and ultimately being the bane of my existence.

To me, the ending of the world was not the worst thing to ever happen; I probably would not even put it in my top three. The worst happened about two years ago, in a small white room that smelled of disinfectant and was filled to the brim with torture instruments. I have had to live with the scars of the whole ordeal, both physical and mental and I'll be damned if I die with the memory still evident on my profile. My final hurrah will be to rectify my biggest flaw.

Do you know what is worse than facing the end of the world? Facing the end of the world with braces.

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><p>It has been said that the world will end with a loud noise, such as a bang, but I can tell you that is not true. It actually sounds a lot like the ringing of an alarm clock; well the beginning of the end does anyway. I may be bias though, it was the first noise I heard on the day of 'The Proclamation', but whatever.<p>

No one knew today was the day our lives would change, it was 'newly discovered', though I'd bet my cat that the scientists knew long before. But why make us panic until it became obvious?

As I walked along the street, blissfully ignorant to the state of the world, I pretended to listen to what my best friend Puck was yammering on about. Something about the newest menu addition to Taco Bell, or maybe it was about how I should pay more attention, but who knows? I was too focused on his older sister, well step-sister actually, but they've never seen each other as anything but family. Blood may be thicker than water, but you need water to survive.

The raven haired beauty leading us was too engrossed in her phone to notice my obvious appreciation and her brother was just as oblivious as he carried on his rant about deep fried tacos. Maybe they share the same genes after all.

I enjoy taking my time watching her; she is the very pinnacle of beauty. An angular jaw, strong yet inherently feminine. A dimple which danced upon her cheek when she genuinely smiled, (which is not often, I sadly remind myself.) Her eyes, they are a contradiction in them self; dark as night, yet full of light. Guarded, yet so full of emotion. Mirthful, yet holding an edge of sadness. Everything about her draws me in, but it is her eyes that first captured me.

I know I'll never have a chance with her, she only sees me as her baby brother's best friend. That and the fact that she is the epitome of perfection and I'm, well, not. A girl can dream though. In those dreams I have perfect teeth and no metal protruding from my mouth. Basically I don't look like I've been fucked in the mouth by a robot, as Puck once eloquently put it. Let me make it clear, my teeth are not horrific, I do not have buck teeth, nor do they look like a witch doctor's necklace. I was simply cursed with an off bite and now I must suffer through this torment.

During my musings I failed to realise we had arrived at William McKinley High School and even more so that Santana had bid us farewell in favour of meeting her friends. Pity, I was enjoying envisioning how we'd look together, sans the tinsel teeth. Mrs. Brittany Lopez has a ring to it, don't you think? I digress though.

School went on as usual, uninteresting and slow. Nothing prominent happened, nothing that I can look back on and say 'this is it. This is a sign of the apocalypse.' It wasn't my fault that I was shocked about how the day would play out; my parents did not raise me under the idea that an apocalypse could happen. I blame them. Infidels.

We were ushered into the hall, ten minutes before end bell, and straight away I should have realised something was off. Principle Figgins does not simply interact with us unless we were in trouble and I very much doubt that the whole school could be. But alas, I did not put two and two together as I spotted the most delectable creature sitting across the bleachers from me. She was sat with her two best friends, Mercedes Jones (who she refers to as Lil' Wayne of something, which I think may be racist) and Quinn Fabray (Puck has a massive crush on her, though he'd never admit it.)

Figgins trotted onto stage and called for attention, but I was too fascinated by Santana sticking Cheetos into Mercedes' hair to really listen. It wasn't until chaos erupted around me that I realised Figgins had said anything and it took Puck to explain to me that a meteor was heading towards Earth and it has the ability to wipe out all life.

"How long do we have, Puck?"

"Figgins," Puck began, "said the scientists say we have about thirty days."

I've never seen Puck look so frightened before, it was oddly endearing to see his bravado break. I looked to the other sibling and to my surprise she was still sat on the bleachers, smirking at the news. If anyone could thrive off anarchy, it would be Santana.

I just stood there, confused and well, shocked. How was I ever going to meet Emma Stone now? Thirty days is not enough time for her to fall in love with me! This day could not get any worse.

As everyone rushed out of the hall and out the school gates, I tried to collect my thoughts. 1) The world is ending. 2) Santana likes destruction. 3) Emma Stone is a no-go. Puck was rambling about how he could not die before the next Call of Duty came out and that the crazy old man, Patches, with the sign saying 'the end is nigh' was right. Guess he isn't as crazy as we thought. It wasn't until he mentioned that dreaded word that I started to panic. Braces.

Fucking braces.

I don't give a rat's ass about Emma Stone, what about my braces! I am going to die with a mouthful of metal! I screamed, flashing my torment at Puck who was the only person left in the school with me. Trying to claw the devil's train track off my teeth, I screeched even louder.

"Is that really necessary?" Puck cut through my yelling. I was too taken about to point out that it was him who even mentioned braces in the first place. Assclown. He latched onto my hand, I briefly thought it was for comfort, until I was dragged out the school with Puck saying he refused to die in school with a screaming lunatic.

The streets of Lima, Ohio, were trashed. It looked like a bomb had detonated in the town centre; glass littered the floor, smoke streamed from windows and I'm pretty sure I just saw a tyre fly across the road. It seems like as soon as people hear a bit of bad news; they lose their shit and break things. It's far too violent for my liking. It wasn't just the people you expect to see running rampant either, I could have sworn I saw my driving instructor smash a door with a crowbar.

My best friend still held tight to my hand, this time I believe for comfort, as we watched the world we knew fall into the arms of mayhem. In that moment, two things became apparent: civilization no longer existed and I was never getting my braces off.

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><p><strong>Hi guys, finally decided to try my hand at a multi fic! Grammar isn't really my thing, so apologies for any mistakes. I tried to rectify them, I swear! <strong>

**Anyway, got this idea off my friend as she asked me what I'd do in regards to my braces if the world ended. I'd probably cry as I've had them for two years and they were supposed to come off, like a year ago. But my orthodontist hates me and I'm pretty sure she's punishing me.**

**Anyway, let me know what you think and give any suggestions if you have any! Any review is helpful!**


	2. Chapter 2

**So I've got this out a lot earlier than I thought I would, but again it's not a very long chapter. I'll probably keep the chapters short for now as I'm busy with college, hockey and driving my sister around. When everything quietens down, I promise I shall make them longer. Unless you guys are okay with shorter, more frequent updates? Anyway, enjoy!**

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><p>When you think of the end of the world, what is it you picture? I used to imagine the human race concluding in some sort of epidemic. You know the kind that causes zombies? It's the way we're all hoping for really; it means all those hours of watching The Walking Dead would actually pay off. As long as it was the strolling Romero type and not the ones who rival Usain Bolt, I could see myself surviving.<p>

However, I am not prepared for being hit by an Asteroid? Comet? Big rock? Who really cares? Names are pretty much meaningless if we're going to be crushed by a giant space boulder. I have no idea how to survive that, at least with zombies I just have to outrun the next person. I mean we could always take a lesson from Armageddon and send off Bruce Willis to fight the planetoid. If everyone makes a contribution of $5 we could easily fund the mission. With his sacrifice, the world would be saved from annihilation and another Die Hard movie. Is that not what we all want?

My plan is highly unlikely though, I don't have the right contacts to make it happen. Maybe Lord Tubbington does though. I'll have to talk to him later.

Back to the problem at hand: as I crossed the streets of Lima, things only appeared to get worse the further I ventured. If something wasn't smashed, it was on fire. If it were neither of those things, it was being stolen. People just seemed to lose all semblance of civility. Neanderthals. I even saw a two girls arguing over a box of Taffy, which then escalated into hair pulling and biting. With my braces I'd totally win the chomping match. But there is absolutely no point stockpiling food if we're all going to die. Plus eating Taffy is an orthodontic clusterfuck and I'd have to spend the next three hours tongue excavating my mouth. I don't have that kind of time to waste.

It wasn't until I was standing outside my house with Puck that I realised I had been stuck in my head again and missed the majority of the walk. I really hope Puck hadn't been saying anything important, but how important can something really be if everything is just going to end in thirty days?

"When is your mum due?" the mohawked teen asked, once again pulling me from my inner dialogue.

"She's not pregnant." Silly question. Next.

"What? No, Britt, I meant what time is she due home? Like, what time does she finish work?"

Well that makes more sense. "6:30 normally, but I don't think she'd stay at work if the world is going to end. So whenever." Puck just nodded and instead of a reply, he once again reached for my wrist, something that seemed to be developing into a habit and I was once again dragged to our next destination: my kitchen.

Nothing interesting happened in the next 30 minutes, not unless you count Puck managing to fit 24 cheese balls into his mouth, which in all honesty I think is totally impressive. I could only get to 12. I blame the braces. Just another reason I loathe them. It wasn't until I heard someone clear their throat that I realised our escapade had been intruded on.

There, standing in all her splendour, was Santana in my kitchen doorway. I was so stunned, both by her beauty and presence, that my first reaction was to open up my mouth. Now you may think that any cheese balls that are tightly jammed into a mouth would stay there, 'cause you know, physics or something. You are wrong. What actually happened was those 12 cheese balls mentioned afore, came rushing out of my mouth and spilled onto the floor. Not my finest moment.

Her brother of course thought it was hilarious, which in turn led him to spit his balls out. As luck would have it, one hit me in the eye. Getting powdered cheese in your cornea is not a painless affair, so in my rush to the sink to wash it out, I ran straight into the fridge. If you've never had braces, let me describe to you how it feels to be hit in the mouth with them in: it's as if you're using broken glass as mouthwash. It hurts like a bitch and the moans I let out where anything but desirable. I wish the asteroid would just strike now.

Santana's laugh was totally worth it though. I'd totally turn her throaty chuckle into a ringtone if I didn't think she'd file a restraining order.

"You alright, Brittany?" she managed to rasp out. See she cares – and I make her laugh – we could so be a thing. But I was too embarrassed to reply, so I just nodded and ducked my head. This day cannot get any worse. Well it could, I could have an entire chicken leg or head of lettuce stuck in my front brackets and not even realise. Trust me, it's been done before.

Instead of bringing up what she just witnessed, she thankfully changed the conversation. "It's madness out there, some bitchlet tried to jump me. It ended badly for him." the Latina nonchalantly stated.

Most people would be perturbed after being attacked, but not Santana. She prospers in pandemonium. As she was re-telling the story about how – and I quote - she 'shoved her foot so far up the guy's ass, his breath smelt like her feet, 'cause that's how they do it in Lima Heights', I couldn't help but admire how she sticks up for herself. I'm not sure how I'd react in that situation, but I know I wouldn't threaten them. Violence is not the answer people.

"Are you okay though, Santana? He didn't hurt you did he?" I said, expressing my concern. I knew she was alright, but I had to make sure.

"I am, thank you." was the reply, along with one of her genuine smiles that displayed that adorable dimple. I wish I could stick my tongue in it. Wait. No. I didn't think that. That's even worse than turning her voice into a ring tone. What the hell is wrong with me! Just smile and pretend you're not a total freak.

"Britt- oh, hello. I didn't realise we would be having company." my mother thought now was the perfect time to arrive and ruin our moment. As soon as she saw the dark haired girl her friendly smile turned into a Cheshire grin; she knew about my secret adoration for her. This isn't good.

"Hi, Mrs Pierce." The siblings answered in unison.

"It's Susan, please. Mrs Pierce makes me sound old and I'm not old yet. Or am I?"she said with a pointed stare, as if to challenge them.

They both shook their heads furiously and I'm pretty sure I heard Puck mumble the word 'MILF'. Pervert. The older blonde seemed happy with the gesture and continued with her questioning. Her blasé attitude threw me off, she hasn't even mentioned the reason of why we were all home early. She's definitely in denial.

"So Santana, I haven't seen you in a while. How are you? How's school? Do you like braces?" Way to be subtle and slip that in there, mom. You have just ruined what little chance I had. She's going to high-tail it away from your craziness any second. My weirdness definitely comes from her, there's no question about it.

Santana's look didn't mirror mine; whilst I was sporting a horrified expression, she just smirked and answered like she wasn't conversing with a fanatical woman. "I can't complain, I'm still alive, which is good. School is over, finally. And erm, I've never had them, so I can't really say."

Her answer isn't really what I wanted to hear. I wanted her to declare that they are the sexiest bits of metal to ever exist, then turn to me, run her tongue across mine and we'd live happily ever after. Well at least for a month. Actually, she'd probably cut her tongue doing that... A girl can dream though.

My mom just raised her eyebrows and laughed. She informed us that she was going to start preparing dinner before my dad got home and that if we didn't leave the kitchen in the next five seconds she was going to force us to help. I'm pretty sure that's child labour, even if I am the youngest at 17.

The three of us headed up to my room and I was a mix of nervous and excitement. I was going to have thee Santana Lopez in my bedroom, albeit not for the reasons I wanted or fantasised about. But who really cares about the details, all you need to know is that I currently have a goddess sat on my bed. It was said goddess to address the elephant in the room as to why she was even present in the first place.

"The whole town has gone crazier than a PMSing woman with coffee withdrawals, who ran out of tampons and got locked out of the Lima Bean. I don't want you two going out by yourselves, it's not safe out there." The tan girl casually stated.

Puck of course did not like being told what to do, especially by his sister, so he began to argue his case. I didn't really pay attention – as usual – I was too focused on Santana's care for me, even if it only stems from the love of her brother. It's nice to know that in a world so fucked up and self absorbed, you have someone out there who's got your back.

Eventually Puck relented and we all agreed that we'd stick together; meaning if you wanted to go somewhere, we all had to go. The mere thought of spending more time with Santana set my lady loins a-tingling. I'd follow her anywhere, in a totally non-stalkerish manner. It was also agreed that we'd help each other fulfil our last wishes. We each pinky swore to both terms.

"So what do you guys want to do before, you know, we all get flattened?" Puck so articulately asked.

Without any hesitation, Santana told us her desires, "Steal some breadsticks... Or a car. Preferably breadsticks. No, both." She has always had this fetish for the local restaurant Breadstix and their breadsticks. It's even rumoured that she even got a waitress fired because she was refused more of the 'doughy delights.' I like that in a woman; standing up for what you believe in. It's hot. But I'm not at all surprised at either of her wants. She's a stick lover and an anarchist.

Puck nodded in agreement and voiced his request, "I want to get with Quinn," both Santana and I gave him a look of disgust.

"No." Santana flat out rebuffed him.

"We have to, we pinkied." I told her. Normally I'm not one to go against her, but a pinky is sacred and I know how much Puck likes the girl.

"Fine, but I better get a shit load of breadsticks." she receded.

Puck fist bumped me and thanked me for getting her to agree. I'm not sure why though, it's not like I fought for it. I merely pointed out a promise she made. They both turned to me and waited for me to state any last desires I have.

I only have one wish, well two, but I don't think she'd agree to the one concerning her, "I want to get my braces off."


End file.
